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Diana Carey's avatar

My husband and I will be spending the holidays at home, visiting neither my family or his. My grandson is hoping to fly over for Christmas but that is the only relative we will be seeing. I used to spend time with my son, who is a devoted trumper. Unfortunately things got to the point where I could no longer tolerate being with him and we have cut ties completely. It is amazing but since our 'divorce' I am much happier, I no longer have heart palpitations, no longer spend sleepless nights and no longer need psych meds. Yes, listen to your body.

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I’m sorry your son has hurt you enough that it’s easier to be without him than with him. If he’s open to healing, I wish that for you. And if he isn’t, I can tell you’ve been working on yourself and your peace.

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Carole Berkoff's avatar

I live in scarlet Ravalli Co & would be thrilled to be part of the resistance! I suggest wearing a white ribbon as the suffragettes wore white or a white paper clip like Danes did during WW2. Good Movie to watch is ON THE BASIS OF SEX.

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I still can’t believe we haven’t met (have we?). We are in each other’s backyards!

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Carole Berkoff's avatar

Do u play pickleball?

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I don’t, no, but I live really close to the pickleball court and I’ve been curious about it. Should I give it a shot?

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Carole Berkoff's avatar

The 406, south end of hamilton?

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

No, I thought you were talking about the one in Florence.

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Carole Berkoff's avatar

Ok, that clarifies that u live N of me & most likely have not crossed paths. There is an active D group or was in your area. Well you never know, our paths could still cross

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Tony Sisinni's avatar

I suggest, a family especially a family with strong common belief system that and then a member or members realized they no longer saw the world the same way as the others those that pulled away are often shunned. It is sad that families are not as strong of a bond as we are led to believe. In addition for all of the people that claim to be Christians that voted for Trump please reread the gospels. There is nothing redeeming about a man that treats others as he has. Trump is not a Christian and nor are the people that follow him. Trump tears others down. He certainly has no desire to lift people up. I don’t look for a sinless person but at least a person that can lead with Jesus’ only idea “ love” love is about helping when others need help and sharing. He loves money and greed isn’t a good virtue. He lives as if life is a zero sum game. He must win at all costs he lies and cheats to win. Not only in politics but in everything he does, business, marriage and even golf. If your family members that follow him because they find him to be Christ like please give your family members a book of the gospels for this Christmas and explain that you will be able to visit again when they are back in sync with the beliefs you all shared at one time. Leave your family for some family time but don’t stop loving them and in the end family is the strongest bond we have and Trump is little more than a blip in life. Don’t lose your family over such a pathetic human being!

I’m not a good writer so I hope I got my point across. Leave

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I should give my family a Trump Bible for Christmas but highlight all the verses about welcoming the foreigner and helping the poor.

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Ione Young's avatar

You should! That would be a great gift! You probably won't receive a thank you note though. ha ha

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Kolette Beckert's avatar

Just commenting on the Supreme Court. Abortion was how conservatives sold it to the white Christian community. The real goal is ending government protections of the environment, consumer and labor protections and a social safety net.

I do somewhat limited holidays with family. My parents are elderly and somewhat dependent on me. We have had periods of semi-estrangement. I cannot change them. We don’t talk politics. If I had small children it might be different. It is worth protecting the young from hateful ideas.

At this stage in our lives there has been a lot of water under the bridge, Childhood abuse, different values, different life choices. I would not say we have reconciliation on any of it, but my mother is starting to talk about her mental illness. I’m so grateful for the work I have done on my own mental health. They are old and sick and in need. I cannot see it as Christ like to abandon them now.

I think that very hard times are coming. There’s a certain amount of schadenfreude in waiting to see what inflation does and how their benefits will be affected.

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I definitely don’t think you should separate from family that depends on you and has limited time on this earth. One of the things that I kept in mind while writing this: The holidays immediately after a major election are an intense time to try to navigate intense emotions. We don’t have to try to cram it all into a few days. There are other holidays, birthdays, and occasions to celebrate and spend time together. My mom and I are working through some of our differences in therapy and hopefully the next time we get to spend Christmas together, we will be in a much better place. There’s also a lot more to our relationship and the hurts we have endured than I could fit into one article. I hope readers walk away with the message that if they are going to visit relatives for the holidays, they are doing so because they want to be there and not out of obligation.

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Murray Smart's avatar

You need to protect your mental and physical health. There is no need to put yourself into a toxic situation. Taking a break (short term, long term, or permanent) from anyone who is toxic to you is okay and good for your health. Maybe sometime in the future you can reconnect, but you do not need to compromise on the things that matter to you. The world is full of people who do care about others, look for them.... And remember that you can spend your time and money helping those in need people and the other creatures we share the world with. Focus on them and you will feel much much better. We are focusing on food shelves, animal shelters, organizations that truly work to help in any manner....... And they REALLY need your help and you will feel so much better because of it!!!!

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Ione Young's avatar

We are hosting Thanksgiving dinner for four friends. Three are like minded and one a strong Trumper and believer of everything on Fox News. We won't mention politics yet I will proudly wear my Ruth Bader Ginsburg apron made by a special friend. Someone will be sure to ask about my apron and I will happily explain. Oh and the "I Dissent" sign in our yard will welcome our guests.

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Cheryl Bramsen's avatar

Wonderful message! Once again you have made your choice as we will with a smaller family gathering without guilt. Thank you for your words.

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JRS 65's avatar

I really wish it could be just our immediate family of 4. But my Trumper in-laws are coming. Usually we do well not talking politics, but I know I cannot hold back my 23 year old daughter from speaking her mind. It might get ugly. I’d prefer Peace.

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Tiffany Torres Williams's avatar

I can really understand your perspective. It might be possible that your daughter needs to speak her mind in order to achieve peace. And she will learn how to do so in a less hostile way the more she practices. Wishing you all the best holiday available to you.

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